440. "The Ticket that Exploded @ the Library"

- Carnegie Library, Oakland Branch, Music Department, Pittsburgh, us@

- Sunday, January 19, 2020, 2:00PM

- By this point in the compiling of these reports on my public actions I give what might seem to be a ridiculous amount of detail in contrast to my reports from decades ago when I had very little documentation from things and I only wrote capsule descriptions that barely tell the reader anything. That, of course, is partially because I'm not in the age of cameras that produce files instead of film that has to be developed & printed - I can do everything at home without having to go to a copy shop, etc, etc. It makes my documenting job vastly easier but some might ask: Why BOTHER?! Obviously I think that what I do is important. This particular report may exemplify this 'overkill'.

When I was 15, probably in the summer of 1969, I heard the band Soft Machine's song "Hope for Happiness" on Baltimore rock radio & loved it. As I recall, most Baltimore radio was abysmal so I found Soft Machine to be of exceptional quality. It wasn't until perhaps 5 years later that I realized that the band had gotten their name from a William S. Burroughs novel. I read the book & was astounded. It was shocking.. & subversively stimulating. I read almost every Burroughs novel in quick succession, gradually losing interest somewhat but finding what seemed like the most experimental quintet of novels (Naked Lunch, The Soft Machine, The Ticket that Exploded, Nova Express, & The Wild Boys) to be astonishing. I even got to witness Soft Machine live (Mike Ratledge, Roy Babbington, Karl Jenkins, John Marshall) in a dreary Baltimore bar when I was underage, using a fake ID. It was the beginning of the end for the band's quality (IMO) but they were still great. Now, 51 years later, I decided to finally name a (M)Usic project after the succesor book to The Soft Machine both as an homage to the band & the author AND because I like the name. Otherwise, the (M)Usic has little or nothing to do with any of the above. When I 1st thought of the project, perhaps as much as a decade before, I thought of having (M)Usical material somehow akin to what was the best of Soft Machine. An example would've been a piece of mine called "Birds of Villa Villa-Lobos (after Michael Pestel)" (published on record in a limited edition of 100 in Germany as part of the Fluxus series as Psych.KG 243 in July, 2015) but I quikcly discarded that idea. Originally, The Ticket that Exploded (or just The Ticket) was intended to be a quintet but it got reduced to the quartet of myself (tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE), Roger Dannenberg, Ben Opie, & Jeff Weston. Mutations of the group can be expected.

In preparation for this gig at the library I approached the head librarian of the Music Deapatment & suggested that their humble display case be used to show work by members of the group that's in the library's collection + additional work to make the exhibit more throough. She entusiastically agreed. I have books, scores, & CDs available through the library; Ben & Roger both have CDs. All this + more scores by myself & Roger were put on display with myself doing the deaign work. This showcasing began on December 26, 2019 & ran until a few days after the gig.

In preparation for The Ticket that Exploded performances, I started working on an overall structure for out playing & I created 2 movies to slot into this structure the soundtracks of which were to be part of our playing. Both are online. Here're the relevant notes & links + stills::

"Bugle Call Medley" - 1080p HD 23.98p, Stereo - 5:00



"Bugle Call Medley": This is the shortest of the 2 (d) compositions created for the Usical group somewhat named "The Ticket [that Exploded]" that consists of tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE on various (tuning forks, music boxes, SFX samples, percussion); Roger Dannenberg on trumpet & laptop; Ben Opie on reeds & electronics; & Jeff Weston on contrabass. Our sets are divided into sequences of progressively longer sections. This is the 1st section, weighing in at 5 minutes, "The Ticket" is our 6th section weighing in at 10 minutes. Since Bugle Calls represent a very specific language with clear meanings to those trained to listen & respond to them as commands, I thought it would be interesting to disrupt their context & put calls out of time slot orders & to present them as (recognizable) fragments that created a less linear & less PAVLOVIAN narrative - something more playful & less militaristic. A "medley" of bugle calls makes no sense in their original context. It's ok if you don't salivate to it. - tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE notes December 25, 2019

"The Ticket" - 960 X 720 / 60fps - 10:00



"The Ticket": This movie, whose sound can be used seperately, is the 'theme song' for the Usical Group. The 1st minute, which consists of this sentence: "The Ticket is what ham radio operators call the license they get from the FCC after they prove their competence at keying Morse Code.", is meant to be presented with only me playing simultaneously. The remianing 9 minutes are meant to be played along with by the remaining members of the group. I've already made another relevant movie that interested people might want to check out: "Morse Code" - 41:35 - 2316 X 1988 / 60 fps - edit finished December 3, 2019 - on my onesownthoughts YouTube channel here: https://youtu.be/MX7BVbVvQg8 - on the Internet Archive here: https://archive.org/details/morsecode_201912 ; - December 10, 2019 notes from tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE

Given the general business of all involved,, we only had a chnace to have one rehearsal the day before the Uncert, on January 18, 2020, ay my house, Who Unit?. I made a movie of this rehearsal which is on my onesownthoughts YouTube channel here: https://youtu.be/JXGa4kbGQaE .

Finally, to the gig at the library itself - which I also made a movie of. Interspersed in the movie s footage from the aforementioned display & its installation. Thanks very much to the library employees for being so open to such a 'strange' event. The piece, such as it is, is very simply structured:

The Ticket that Exploded OUTLINE

- tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE - revised January 16, 2020


tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE playing a marching sound effect on an overturned copper baby bathtub at the beginning of "Bugle Call Medley"

0-5:00: Begin with the sound to "Bugle Call Medley" the 1st minute only tENT plays with the recording, the next 4 minutes everyone is welcome to join in. Players can either restrict themselves to the 5 notes of the bugle scale: C4, G4, C5, E5, G5 (actually one half step lower); or play whatever you feel like playing - the most important thing being to just play during the end 4 minutes & to then STOP for a brief pause between sections.

Jeff Weston & Ben Opie shown playing during part of a "Bugle Call Medley" "Funeral March" section.

5:05-11:05: tENT plays a solo for 1 minute. Everyone joins him for the ensuing 5 minutes & then STOP for a brief pause between sections.

tENT's score for his SFX samples premiered at this Uncert

11:10-18:10: Jeff Weston plays a solo for 1 minute. Everyone joins him for the ensuing 6 minutes & then STOP for a brief pause between sections.

18:15-26:15: Ben Opie plays a solo for 1 minute. Everyone joins him for the ensuing 7 minutes & then STOP for a brief pause between sections.

26:20-35:20: Roger Dannenberg plays a solo for 1 minute. Everyone joins him for the ensuing 8 minutes & then STOP for a brief pause between sections.

35:25-45:25: tENT plays along with the 1st minute of "The Ticket" soundtrack Everyone joins him for the ensuing 9 minutes & then STOP for a brief pause between sections.


45:30-56:30: An exactly 11 minute free-for-all.

The result is a somewhat oneiric morphing narrative. - February 5, 2020 notes from tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE

- on my onesownthoughts YouTube channel here: https://youtu.be/Uw2sDzENK6o

- recollections from tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE


441. "Heretic InExile in this ZOO(m)"

- various homes, Pittsburgh, us@

- Tuesday, April 28, 2020, 8:15PM

- In 1940, Hitler envisioned a New World Order governed by the German people. Germans were referred to as a single body of sorts, a superorganism threatened by the 'disease' of the ethnically & politically 'unclean' & 'degenerate'. Fortunately, he failed to establish his 1,000 year Reich - but not before millions of people were murdered.

Forty years later, in 1980, Reagan envisioned a New World Order, a one world government in which, apparently, the United States of America, being the 'good guys' similar to the white-hat-wearing cowboys of his movie roles, would be the police fighting off the 'evils of communism'. During this time he attended a ceremony honoring nazi SS officers at Bitburg, Germany. Fortunately, he failed to establish this New World Order - but not before multiple covert actions in Latin America had massacred people resisting having their natural resources plundered by American corporations.

Another 40 years later, in 2020, & the New World Odor stinks more than ever in the era of the G20 & the billionaires of the world whose pimple, Rump, exemplifies the dumbing-down of human consciousness. One World Government has been all but officially established in the name of 'our own good' & brainwashing has succeeded under the guise of health where previous excuses for GROUPTHINK had failed. Quarantyrrany has been established & economic dependence on Big Brother will help keep it that way.

People are under 'lockdown-lite', staying in our homes 'for our own good' & to 'Save Lives' during a time of a pandemic that entirely too many people believe in unquestioningly thanks to the fear-mongering of the mass media. In order to grab whatever snatches of sociability we can, many are using video-conferencing technology to meet 'virtually'. Hence on Tuesdays, starting April 21, 2020, & continuing indefinitely, Jeff Weston has organized a series of concerts using Zoom to bring together the players & audience in small groups. Instead of passively sitting in front of the boob tube soaking up the oversimplification of sound bytes & destroying our ability to freely think we proactively continue to produce our own culture. I think of the mathematicians gathered around the Anonymous statue in Budapest during the nazi occupation of Hungary. Perhaps that's too dramatic but I think a similar spirit is at work.

Short sets were played by Emily Cook, myself (tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE), LeeJane Capps, David Gerard Matthews, & a trio called "threebee" consisting of Samir Gangwani, Andrew Hook, & Justin Kelly. For me, such a gathering of minds serves the purpose, feeble as it may be, of keeping individual intelligence alive in an era in which humanity is truly at risk of becoming a superorganism in which individuals might become completely abolished by brainwashing. It's possible, if not probable, that even my fellow players didn't & don't feel as harshly about all this as I do. I introduced myself as "tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE, Heretic InExile in this ZOO(m) & I just want to say that the New World Odor.. STINKS!".

My set consisted of playing Neil Feather's instrument, the Melocipede, set up to have 2 of its 4 pick-ups output to stereo speakers & 2 of its pick-ups mixed down to send a signal to a Pitch-to-MIDI converter that then sent a MIDI signal to a sampler playing my SFX samples. Additionally, I played a 2 octave set of Antique Cymbals with a touch of other percussion: chime tree, 2 frying pans, & 2 extremely cheap cymbals. .

- on my onesownthoughts YouTube channel here: https://youtu.be/DHn2KEiQQRY

- recollections from tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE


442. "You'll Never See A Billionaire Standing In A Food Line"

- a chain supermarket, Pittsburgh, us@

- Monday, May 4, 2020

- Starting in 2000, in Australia, I've participated in 12 May Day Parades in the last 20 years. The last 10 of them have been in my neighborhood on an annual basis. For most or all of these there's been a cabaret the night before. I've participated in a few of those. I've given a speech as part of the last 8 parades. May Day in general, & these parades in particular, have been important to me. I think they're valuable expressions of worker solidarity and I've been honored to express my thoughts every year. Alas, last year, in 2019, I felt like the parade was getting subtly off-track, that it was harder & harder for me to feel part of the general political vibe. To address this issue I made a feature-length movie about all my May Day experiences & about my discomfort with the 2019 May Day. The movie's called "AMD", an acronym I created with humorous intent which stands for "Administrator Meeting Disorder". This movie is on my onesownthoughts YouTube channel here: https://youtu.be/IQgkC5OwPmw . After 2019, I decided that I probably wouldn't give any more May Day speeches, at least as part of the local parade, but that I'd still participate in the cabaret & the parade itself.

On March 19, 2020, the Governor of Pennsylvania, the state where Pittsburgh is, declared a quarantine the purpose of which was stated to be in prevention of an anticipated COVID-19 pandemic in the area. Only 'essential' businesses were to remain open, the 'non-essential' were to close for the duration of the pandemic. An example of an 'essential' business is Dunkin Donuts, an example of something 'non-essential' is the public library. In other words, big corporate businesses stayed open, including a business whose main function is to fill people up with sugar, while a free educational & entertainment service for the general public is closed. My own priorities find this completely despicable & suspect.

The level of dialog quickly deteriorated into a match between 'right-wing' resistance to the quarantine such as that by small business owners in areas where little or no occurences of COVID-19 occurred & the 'left-wing' who immediately uncritically embraced all justifications for the lockdown in order to avoid being tarred as 'right-wingers'. Any more subtle or analytical position was immediately squelched as treacherous to one side or the other. I was & still am disgusted since any opinions I tried to express have been attacked by GROUPTHINK regardless of whether the attacks have anything to do with what I'm actually saying.

Throughout it all, my preoccupation has been with socio-political elements that use the pandemic for justification. While I think that some aspects of the pandemic have been exaggerated by the mass media for its usual reason of SELLING SENSATIONALISM I've never denied that people have been getting sick & dying. Nonetheless, any criticism I put forth has been vehemently misinterpreted and viciously attacked by 'liberals' as if I'm insensitively denying that people are dying. This despicable practice is no different than what the current president does, in fact, it's in pretty much the same spirit - despite the 'liberals' positioning themselves as his opposite, in relation to what I call the PANDEMIC PANIC they're just as neo-nazi as he is on issues like immigration.

My extremely carefully considered & researched opinion is that this lockdown is a mind control experiment meant to test whether a seemingly legitimate cause can be used to justify unreasonable restrictions of civil liberty. Any analysis along these lines has been attacked with bullying & misrepresentation by people I no longer consider to be friends. None of these people have ever been as politically active as I am; none of them have written about political issues at length, as I have; none of them have made political movies, as I have. But NOW, they're suddenly condescending to tell me what to think. When browbeating me doesn't work, they say that I'm a Rump supporter even though they know I'm not. Such knowledge is neither here nor there, however, because to the bully what matters is to try to shame me back into their fold. Well their 'fold' is their ass-crack & I have no desire whatsoever to be there.

Somewhere along the line it was undemocratically decided that the May Day parade & other related activities wouldn't happen presumably so that the people involved would stay in compliance with the governor's orders. I was certainly never asked for my opinion. Heaven forbid that the revolution not get permission from the school principal.

SO, I decided to stage my own little rebellion all on my lonesome. The other people in the line could be a parade of sorts. Since it's my opinion that separating oneself from nature through sterilization & mask-wearing is more likely to weaken one's immune system than the oppositie, I've been particularly resistent to wearing the masks that've become required by law to be worn while entering businesses. Wanting to buy food at a place where a mask would be required for admission I decided that it would be funny to wear a mask of a certain famous billionaire with a moustache drawn on it evocative of another well-known dictator. While this billionaire is reputed to be against the lockdown I find him to be just as much a part of the problem as all the rest.

I waited in line, the requisite 6 feet between me & the other tired souls, & eventually entered the store, bought a few items, & left. At the cash register I said something to the effect of "You'll never see a billionaire standing in a food line so now's your chance" The workers accepted all this in good grace & at least 2 of them complimented me on the mask. Thanks to my own hidden camera & to a friend who acted as a clandestine cameraperson stationed in my parked car I got footage that I then used to make a short quasi-documentary with. Here're the online notes for that:

"You'll Never See A Billionaire Standing In A Food Line" notes - 4:55 - 1080p : I am a HERETIC. I think that the PANDEMIC PANIC is being used by opportunists to experiment with MIND CONTROL and to condition people to have their lives controlled 'for their own good'. This opinion is sometimes foolishly associated with 'Conservatives' by 'Liberals'. But, no, I'm not either, I'm a FREE THINKER, I'm CRIMINALLY SANE, I'm a THOUGHT CRIMINAL. The degree of pressure that's on the few of us who are trying to think outside the MONOLITHIC NARRATIVE is astounding. Since I exist mainly in a 'liberal' culture it's sickening to see this culture use bullying, misrepresentation, lying, brow-beating, and so on to try to force the few HERETICS and SKEPTICS into going along with the program(ming) instead of reaching our own conclusions. Because of this pressure, and it isn't 'peer pressure' because there's no way these people are even remotedly my 'peers', I think of 'Liberalism' as basically a new variation on Neo-Nazism: something I'm adamantly opposed to. No doubt, 'Liberals' will strenuously object to this observation of mine. As is usually the case, I see the ultra-wealthy and their institutions as being the culprits that this dumbing down of humanity into a passive superorganism will benefit. The masses are, indeed, as The Matrix depicted it, just an energy source for the Lords of the Flies. For the last 10 years I've participated in a May Day Parade, a parade celebrating worker's struggles and gains. For the last 8 years I've given a speech as part of this parade. Not so this year. The parade didn't happen. I deduce that it was decided against by people convinced that the QUARANTYRRANY is for the public good. This little action of mine, minor though it is, was my revolt, my tiny attempt to keep the struggle moving forward. - May 5, 2020 (Vision) notes from tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE

- Tags: May Day, tENTATIVELY a cONVENIENCE, ProjectileObjects, billionaires, PANDEMIC PANIC, masks, food lines, criminal sanity, thought criminal, heretics, skeptics

The speech that I used as the explanatory narrative for the movie is as follows:

"You'll Never See A Billionaire Standing In A Food Line"


- May 4, 2020 (Vision)

You'll never see a Billionaire standing in a food line and you're not seeing one now. Instead, you're seeing an anarchist with a mask on depicting a well-known billionaire adorned with a suggestive moustache. This gives the anarchist an excuse to use a media figurehead to get your attention for ideas that that figurehead would never express.

"There's no such thing as bad publicity" is sometimes attributed to 19th century American showman and circus owner P. T. Barnum but it might as well be the motto of a certain billionaire. My sense of the saying's application in this instance is that no matter how idiotic the quotes are that the billionaire generates it's still publicity that makes him seem familiar and the familiar, as with music, becomes consonant.

What if the purpose of this media bombardment, this constant presence, is to dumb down the general consciousness of the people of the world? The pro-Rump faction gets dumbed down by believing all the shit that the Rump emits while the anti-Rump faction gets dumbed down by ALSO believing that he means all the shit. The result is a highly polarized, divided and conquered society in which BOTH SIDES believe that 'if you're not with us, you're against us.'

But what about the rest of us? What about those of us who can pay attention to anyone's opinions and ideas and evaluate them on a basis that has nothing to do with what 'side' they supposedly generate from?

As a FREE THINKER I question the PANDEMIC PANIC. I see it as an opportunistic exploitation of the fear of death that's been hyper-exaggerated by mass media in order to distract the susceptible public into not noticing that a global reorganization of power is taking place.

According to my own life experience, which I value more highly than any doctor's opinion, it's unhealthy to not allow one's environment to immunize you through coexisting with it; it's unhealthy to be socially isolated; it's especially unhealthy to let other people run your life for you. Even if you MAKE MISTAKES, they're YOUR MISTAKES. I am NOT a worshipper at the Temple of the DOCTOR GODS nor at the temples of any other power-mad megalomaniacs who want to subjugate me - and claims of this subjugation being 'for my own good' are intuitively and intellectually experienced by me as the opposite. Any type of police state, even 'Medical Police State Lite', is not in my best interest.

Instead, I think that humanity is being psychologically conditioned to be a Pavlovian Dog, to essentially be ''living' in Virtual 'Reality'', to be so out of touch with unmediated real experience that only mediated non-experience is accepted as 'real' any more. As such, people whose attention is riveted to fear-mongering so-called 'news' and to the approved information sources that match their subcultural identities are more likely to believe prefabricated stories than they are the more immediate evidence of their own senses.

People not living in crowded cities, will still believe that they're as threatened by epidemic circumstances as people living in a city with a population density FIVE TIMES that of their own - even though that makes no sense.

With these, and many other critical and CRIMINALLY SANE THOUGHT CRIMES in mind, I prefer to not obey the laws that have been laid down 'for my own good'. Nonetheless, if I want to buy food from a store that requires a mask then a mask it is - but why wear just any old ordinary mask? Why not wear the mask of a well-known billionaire?

Because "You'll never see a Billionaire standing in a food line", after all, their servants do the food shopping and preparation for them. Let this remind you that no matter how much a figurehead pretends to be working class to manipulate a certain demographic into feeling like he's just another asshole in the family, he's NOT working class, he was born into extreme privilege and this P. T. Barnum act is based on the knowledge that 'a sucker is born every minute.' And the suckers are on BOTH sides of the great artificial divide.

I knew that as soon as I'd make this movie public at least one friend of mine would be outraged by it. He was & he had the kneejerk reaction that I'm denying that a pandemic exists. By this point, I was so sick of people misinterpreting my criticisms of the PANIC as denial of the PANDEMIC that I took my friend's outrage as a sign that he's hopelessly brainwashed & unfriended him, quite probably for good.

- on my onesownthoughts YouTube channel here: https://youtu.be/I_r8F-oMtYE

- on the Internet Archive here: https://archive.org/details/youll-never-see-a-billionaire

- recollections from tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE


443. "Heretic InExile in this 2020.05.12 ZOO(m)"

- various homes, Pittsburgh, us@

- Tuesday, May 12, 2020

"Heretic InExile in this 2020.05.12 ZOO(m)": In order to avoid becoming a complete QUARANTINIAC (a person who goes insane under quarantine) I've been trying to keep my creative life on track regardless of the way entirely too much of the world's human population is bending over & spreading it for their 'vaccination'. One mild-mannered way of doing this is to participate in the Improv Tuesdays organized by Jeff Weston over Zoom. I called these Zoom sessions "ZOO(m)s" because it's like a nice bourgeois panopticon, we're all in our comfy cells in ZOO-WORLD where the 'masters' can watch us on surveillance cameras. We get to see ourselves too but we don't get to see the 'masters'. ANYWAY, I'm not knocking the Tuesday Improvs because they've been fun & I appreciate Jeff's organizing of them.

For this episode of My Life In Progress, I reminisce about being a teenage musician & imagine what might have happened if I hadn't been arrested in a stolen car but had, instead, made it to a music festival & played my special brand of, unfortunately, covers of Leonard Cohen & Incredible String Band & such on the 12 string acoutic guitar I was hitch-hiking with. Gosh! I might've been 'discovered', much as Columbus, 'discovered' America.

- on my onesownthoughts YouTube channel here: https://youtu.be/Mfd7YUIGXKM

- recollections from tENTATIVELY, a cONVENIENCE






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